Fade to Black

My name is Exétafus
   I am where realities
	and
	destinies
		collide.
But what of
	mi
	  destiny…
 I make a
	hobby
	    of it.
  Sometimes
	  I
	  imagine
	Its a story
		I'm writing
	    or being written;
Sometimes —
 I listen
      for cues on
	  the wind
     or search
	for clues
	 in yesterday's
	    Newspaper…
	and unpopular fiction
Sometimes…
	I think I catch
		the scent
		   the flavor
		  in an
		     ethnic
			fast-food
			    meal
Sometimes
	I pretend
		I'm one of you
		   and that
		     /this/ is all
…Fiction…
Philosophically,
	I realize;
	    I understand
	  that I could
		be crazy —
	     (Not "Psycho," that's
			another person,
			  a /jewel/, perhaps…)
	That perhaps
	    behind
		all the dreaming
			and seeing
			   and magic
				and proud righteousness
			Is just
			   a simple
			     tall,
				 skinny
				    guy
			     with
			   a
			     broken mind.
But
  normally I'm not
	that
	   Serious
	and rarely
	   that
	      depressing
The facts of
	my
	   existance…
     the truths I tell…
		are self-evident
The beauty I seek,
	    however,
	is elusive.
   Will I know you?
	Will I know you,
		When you call
			my name?
	Will I know you,
		When you say
		   you —
			Love…
		me?
	Will I know you
		When
		   you
		stifle my
		     fears
		 of the
		    dark
		and the
		   human-creatures
			who devour
			   the world's innocence
			and betray their
			     brothers
			 and burn down the
			      garden
			  for a strip-mall
			     or a dance-hall
				or just
				  a parking lot?
What becomes
	of the
	  couple
	     after the
	  'Happily ever after' ?
   and the horseman
	after
      he rides off into the
		sunset?
	 fade to black
	    and get
	 ready for
		the next
		    feature?
		Or snap awake,
		    take a deep
			  breath
		  start making
			coffee
		     take a
			shower
		  comb
		     hair
		    brush teeth
	Go
	   to
	      work
            but later,
		perhaps…
			during lunch,
		think:
	'Wow, what a wild dream'
	   and dare
	      to wish
	     to dream
	      again.
	Or better,
	   return
	       to the
		black and white
			western
	      that is life
		and get
	      another cup
		   of
		coffee
	no popcorn
		for this
			feature—
	   (your) future
		Its gonna be
			a bumpy
			   ride.
But I'll be there;
	looking for
		you.
    Dreaming of the
	Mind's freedom
 and the soul's
	U-P-S (or FedEx) delivery
     and the body's
	sudden
	   surprising
		ability to go, too…
       or will it
	be a quiet
	 subtitled
		French film…?
     Someone else brings
	     coffee
	and she's not there…
And I'm not there
	—except in
	     film class…
    with books
      and not popcorn
     and I wonder
	why we
	    Spoil
		the movie
		   by trying
			to study
			    it.
	     And there it all is:
		Why spoil
			the destination
			   by charting
				it on a
				    map
		Why cut
			the montage
				of travel
			for the sake
				of editing
					or viewing time…
	Why interrupt
		the journey
		   to
		     study
			the future
		     that only
			remembers
		the parts
		     that weren't
				spent studying?
	 Take it all in.
		Take a deep breath
			Grab the popcorn
		Hold on tight.
		You're gonna love it.
	      Especially if he finds you—
		Especially if I find
				you…
	(fade to black)
		(roll credits)
			the end.
			   ×
				by R. Wesley Edwards