4:30 AM; 20010323
: so did you turn it on?
: looks like it. Did you?
: I had offline messages from her.
: heart wrenching. You must know.
: but I'm the guy
Isn't that a boot to the head?
: Aren't I supposed to be the asshole?
: if you love her tell her
: I think I am way past the place where I think what I feel matters.
: I'm even past the place where I think what I /think/ matters.
: The only thing that matters is action. I am inactive, so it doesn't matter.
: what went wrong did she tell you?
: I'm happy you found me. I was going to try to go back to social poker to get your id.
: she told me, but it doesn't seem to have a basis in the reality I'm accostomed to.
: and anyway you're a girl!! If she told the truth, the complete truth and was completely right
: would I admit it all to you?
: and if I did, would it be a clensing or a way to say: "leave me alone, I'm baaaaaaaaad"
: Actually I think I know what is wrong.
: what is the reason?
: Our distance cause frequent miscommunication.
: Anyway this is a somewhat troubling topic. Do you mind if we talk about something less
sensitive?
: so you dont live in the same place?
: oh. You must have logged in later in the convo. No, we don't.
: lol yes i did
: But really, truly
I will do anything to change the subject.
: lol ok tell me more about yourself
: We can talk about it if you really want to, but I bet we've both had the conversation before. and I don't want to be on this side of it.
: ohkay, but if I'm going to do that tell you about me, it has to be answer for question, question for answer, k?
: its ok i dont want to make you uncomfortable
: I'm uncomfortable, you aren't making me anything. I'd just rather not discuss it. Ya know? Its something I have to dwell on in private
: I'm certain you understand. I think everyone has broken up with someone, and everyone has been broken up with.
: strangely this is interesting, about me I am rarely the one someone breaks up with.
: I'm usually the one doing the breaking up.
: what about you? (since we're still close to the topic)
: i'm usually the one that gets broken up with
: aha. We are opposites there.
: is your favorite color green?
: lol yes it is how did you know?
: I said we were opposites on that one thing. I took a stab that we were opposites on another thing.
: I expected to be wrong.
: lol what is yours?
: But you are in your mid thirtys
so you must be in a stable relationship, yes?
: the opposite of green is red. art-color-wheel-wise.
: divorced
: shit.
: I think I feel divorced. But don't let me bring up the topic either.
: lol
: divorced. I'm a child of divorce.
: i'm ok with it now hes comming around and wanting to court me again
: not that I knew. I was 2 at the time and all I ever knew was mom.
: wtf?
: don't do it.
: close the door and don't look back.
: I have cold-hearted advice.
: i didnt want the divorce in the first place
: then you should most definately not let him do it to you again.
: find someone who won't divorce you.
: I don't know you very well, but you don't deserve that.
: ahh but the kids want their daddy back
: in my view, someone who does something will do it again.
: in fact : broke up with me once before
: divide custody or something work something out
: dont be with someone for the kids.
: they'll be better off if you don't.
: you won't be doing them a favor by showing weakness.
: am I a military-strategist about this, or what?
: he said he was going thru a mid life crisis
: I need counceling. I've decided.
: aren't we all.
: aren't we all just going through a rough patch that's no excuse
: lol but hes 46 he deserves to go thru one
: mid life crisis.
: no
: no one deserves to go through one
: let me ask you something
: ok shoot
: when you feel bad and it happens to be around your period, do you get all bitchy and then excuse it because of pms?
: nope
: do you say, "Deal with it, it was pms?"
: nope i really dont get bitchy
: well, then. Don't let him do that either. It isn't cool. People are supposed to be able to act civilized and responcibly
: hes being really sweet about things and trying
: ohkay
or if someone has been drinking then they run over a civilian or two with their heavy old giant car,
: *shrugs*
I am not in a position to give anyone advice.
: but I urge you to consider. Think about how you felt when it was all going down the first time, the hurt, the betrayal
: lol its ok i'm enjoying this its a different point of view than the one i have been getting
: I'm assuming that you were hurt and betrayed by his wanting to dissolve the vows.
: you've been getting: "go back with him?"
: yes
: fuck that. who were you talking to, his mom?
: yes
: ew!!
: talk about a limited-liability.
: if you're taking the view that she's responcibile for him.
: Of course he's sorry
he comes from my loins and anything from me is supergood
: *shivers*
: lol no shes not but he loves the kids and hes a good father
: find a group of bitchy thirtysomething women at a bar somewhere west of town you never go to and hang out with them.
: so he can be a good father
: I will never advocate separating children from a parent. But it doesn't mean you have to let him have his cake, eat it too, step on it and then make you bake him a new one.
: lol nah dont like bitchy women
: no one likes bitchy women.
: but there must be a /reason/ for it. a reason they are so angry
: you should be angry.
: this person said he'd be with you forever
: then you are saying he tried to say it isn't true anymore
: its been a year i'm over it i'm not into self pity
: now he's saying it was like a vacation?
: it isn't self-pity I'm suggesting. it is self protection.
: You have just entered a phase of your life where you are most likely to meet someone who /will/ be with you forever.
: lol well nothing is set in stone i'm taking things slow
: But I have an idea for you if you don't want my war-zone tactics with concerns to relationships.
: (if you want to hear any more of my ideas)
: lol sure but i'm sorry i need to go to work now
: maybe we'll catch each other again
: we're on each-other's friends lists
so yeah, we will.
: I was going to say: pretend you don't know him. He is the divorced father of kids you like.
: start over.
: make him take you to expensive dinners
: and take loads of pictures
: well see its hard to find someone willing to take on four kids tho
: I've recently become a seriously nostalgic sort of person with respect to photographs
: four?!
: well
3 and a half is my limit.
: yes four
: but do you really need a relationship? You should try not looking
: lol a half a kid???
: the love of your life is waiting for you to stop looking
: 3 and one on the way?
: I was kidding.
: i know but i have to go i'll talk to you again it was enjoyable
: at the end of the day, you have only to ask yourself one question:
: "is he the man of my dreams"
: yes, it was fun.
: tata.
: ok bye
Yahoo! Messenger: has logged out. (3/23/01 at 4:59 AM)